Or an alternate title: 12 on 12/12.
I can already tell this is going to be a bit of an all-over-the-place blog today. I've run out of steam and brain cells for the day and am well past the point where I just need to put my legs up the wall, put on a knee brace, and foam roll today's miles out of my legs! I'm feeling very happy, but I notice on long run days I tend to lose quite a few brain cells. I'll have to work on that...
Maybe I'm also feeling loopy because of the day. I ran 12 miles on 12/12/13 - which also happens to be my last day as a 28-year-old. Tomorrow starts the concluding year of my 20's, and when I think about the distance I've travelled in that decade as a person...it's staggering. And also makes me wince a little to think of me at 20. (She wasn't terribly happy or healthy)
I was talking about this to my awesome boss, who was replaying what 29 was like for her - it was a great year in her life and a lot of amazing things happened for her personally and professionally. I've felt that way about 28...and 27, and 26, and 25. (24 started low but ended high) I told her that truly every single year since I've lived in New York has been better than the last. Blame it on Marc, or yoga, or how much I truly love my job, on running more, or just on this gorgeous city. What I really think it comes down to is how a blend of all of those external things affects me as a whole.
Bad things have happened in those years - and lord knows bad days and weeks and moments have come around too. There was some heartbreaking family stuff this year (weddings tend to bring that out, I guess) and things aren't always sunshine and roses.
I think what it all comes down to is how I - or anyone - deal with the inevitable crap life throws at you. And understanding that with good years you'll inevitably have bad years to follow at some point. Not to sound fatalistic or like I think my happiness has a time limit, but it's just the way the world works. (Unless you are freakishly blessed) I think that for me, the good and happy times build me up in a way that makes the tragedies and disappointments easier to deal with. (Often after a few good hysterical cries, but that's me)
This is a totally random quote to close this entry on, but like I said - feeling a little loopy. I think part of the blood that's supposed to help my brain run is too busy hanging out in my legs post-run.
Marc and I love the 2010 movie The Social Network about Mark Zuckerburg. There's a moment when the Winklevoss twins have lost an important race, and a lovely English actor comes over and says, "Got to take the bitter with the better, boys."
Obviously Aaron Sorkin didn't make that up - it's an old expression - but Marc and I will often quote that to each other in the same kind, lovely English accent when a disappointment of some kind comes up. It's a gentle perspective-giver.
In a way, it's very yogic. Life is about experiencing it more than judging it, accepting it how it is instead of forcing it to be something its not, and figuring out a way to be present for all of it. Right now I'm just soaking up all the gratitude I can for all the 'better' I've got going on.
Been playing this in my Prenatal and Mom & Baby classes since Thursday. May we all have such strength and grace. RIP Queen.
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